NFL Week 5 Wrap-Up: Five Still Fighting

With a $1000 grand prize on the line, the five remaining NFL Survivor participants all made it through Week 5 easily. The Dallas Cowboys – at (-17), the biggest favorite of the week – turned out to be the most nerve-wracking of the three teams selected, as their 9-point victory over the Bengals paled in comparison to the Giants’ 44-6 shellacking of the Seahawks and the Panthers’ 34-0 victory over the Chiefs. In Week 6, the big favorites are the Redskins (-13.5 over the Rams), the Vikings (-13.5 over the Lions), and the Giants (-9 over the Browns).

In ALACS Fantasy Football, Justin Zelik’s Brent Huckelberry earned Team of the Week honors in the USC Division with a 158-point performance that tied the season high across all of the ALACS leagues. Zelik can thank his 56-point Carolina Combo of DeAngelo Williams and the Panthers’ D – plus solid contributions from Ben Roethlisberger (27), Kyle Orton (25), and Michael Turner (18). Dan Goldman’s TriCrownThreat was a hard-luck loser to Huckelberry; Goldman’s 116 points were 2nd in the USC Division in Week 5. Elsewhere, Team Handman prevailed 97-96 over Steve Duin’s Father Figures after getting a 16-point boost from Devery Henderson on MNF. Brendan Meyer’s Roxy Returns saw its lead atop the standings shrink to 1.5 Power Points after turning in its worst performance of the season.

Chaos reigns supreme in the GU Division, which has some of the closest standings the Commish has ever seen in a fantasy football league. Some fun facts to illustrate just how close the competition in this division is:

- 13 wins separate the best (33-22) and worst (20-35) Breakdown records in the GU Division. In the other two divisions, the best and worst Breakdown records are separated by 27 wins (USC) and 31 wins (LO).

- The two highest-scoring teams in the GU Division this season – Sean Stokke’s The Taters and Willis Barnes’ Team BigMan, both at 501 points – stand at 1-4 and 2-3 in H2H record, respectively.

- EIGHT teams in the GU Division have between 485 and 501 points on the season.

Tim Hokit’s Hail Hokit moved back into first place after Reggie Bush’s 27-point explosion on MNF, which earned Hokit a 6-point victory over The Taters – another hard-luck loser (The Taters had the second highest score in the GU Division in Week 5). Mike Marty’s One-Eyed Wonder, who had sat atop the Power Rankings with 36 points after Week 4, dropped to 2nd after an ALACS-low 56 points in Week 5. A rough season continued for Trevor Severeid’s 0-5 Ass Hats, who lost 110-93…with a 32-point performance from DeAngelo Williams on the bench.

In the LO Division, the aforementioned Carolina Combo found itself united again, and this time led John Rosinbum’s Fourth and Schlong to a stunning 112-100 upset over Stu Schrager’s Silver Fox. In more somber news, Billy Schreyer – on suicide watch since the brooms came out on his Chicago Cubs – left five players with byes in his Week 5 lineup…and almost pulled off an upset over Mike Shoff’s Harmony Souljaz, which needed Bernard Berrian’s 17-point showing on MNF to pull off a 74-67 victory. Rudi’s Luggage owner Kyle Davis – irate over Billy’s dismal effort – has put a bounty on Schreyer’s head, and declared Mike Shoff’s 2nd place standing in the LO Division “a travesty.”

In NFL Pick ‘Em, John Rosinbum led the way with a 9-3 record in Week 5, thrusting him back atop the standings with a 41-30 record on the season. Rosinbum’s closest competitors are Kyle Davis and Brett Mullin, coworkers who share a 39-32 record (how cute!). Four players sit three games back of Rosinbum at 38-33.

In NCAA Pick ‘Em, Joe Simich regained the lead after going 6-3. Joe can thank the five players who surrounded him at the top of the leaderboard after Week 5; they went a combined 12-33 in Week 6. In stark contrast to most of the weeks this season, the pick distribution was remarkably close for every game in the pool outside of UW/Arizona (in which 68% of the pool incorrectly chose UW to cover). In the other nine games featured, check out the pick distribution amongst the 22 NCAA Pick ‘Em players: 13/9, 11/11, 11/11, 10/12, 9/13, 12/10, 11/11, 10/12, 12/10. This could mean that Vegas is getting better at picking accurate lines as the season goes on…or it could mean absolutely nothing.

Until next week...